Where Did All the Good People Go?

The summer went by so fast. I didn't even have time to blog any more till now. I feel like there's so much to say, but I don't even know where to begin or if all of it even matters any more. Noel and I sort of made amends, but she still doesn't seem to think that she was the problem and not me so I don't know how our "friendship" will turn out now that were so extremely far apart. I mean if we can't stay in contact when we live fifteen minutes from each other how would we stay in contact when we're like 15 hours or so from each other? Well anyways its funny now that I have officially moved away from my home-town, high school, high school friends, etc. I'm really starting to see how much of a joke my "friends" are. They don't care. We all know they don't care and never really did. They just wanted you to think that their friendship with you was something that was important to them. In the end I truly think they all just cared about their popularity, which is really sad. I mean great they wanted to be social and have friends, but where will that get them in the future? Well popularity and knowing the right people now-a-days I guess will get you far, but that is really despicable, in my opinion. I'm going to work hard for my future. At least I will know that I earned it fair and square right? Well anyways...I'm up at college now and I guess it's not all I'd been hoping it'd be, at least so far. Maybe when my classes start it will be better, because I'll have something to keep me entertained and not worried about what other people are doing. I came to college ready to try to be outgoing and not so introverted like I usually am. It worked at first, but then it just started to seem like no one really cared anyways. I'm not obnoxiously pretty or bubbly so I feel like sometimes people just look me over. In my opinion, I'm one of those people that you really have to get to know before you'll want to hang out with more or anything. If that makes since? Back to what I was trying to say before though, I just wish that not everyone at college was obsessed with partying and drinking. It's just dumb, I wish that other people could see that. I feel like I'm the one at fault, because I'm not drinking and being "social". But I guess it's just something I have to deal with. My roommates went out tonight and they said that they weren't hardly going to drink at all. I said it was totally fine and that I'd just stay here and watch a movie with my boy friend, but it's really starting to bother me now. I feel like they're going to start hanging out all the time and doing this kind of stuff that I refuse to do and they'll start getting close and all be the odd man out, which stinks because that's what I've tried so hard to get away from. Maybe I'll meet some cool people in some of my classes though. I have to try to be optimistic, especially when I'm always on the edge of tears from being homesick. It's hard. I was trying to figure out why I'm so against alcohol and partying, well like what gave such negative feelings about it and I've decided on two things. It's sort of late though so maybe I'll continue on in that subject in my next blog...